Before you continue into a serious dating relationship, you need to ask the following question: “Is there already abuse going on in the relationship and how can I get out of it?” Considering that 33.33% of all teen girls are abused by their dates there’s a 1 in 3 chance that abuse is going on right now.
The truth is that the longer you stay in the abusive relationship, the more intense the violence will become. It does not get better over time. And, no one is justified in attacking you just because he or she is angry. No one, including you deserves to be abused. Nope, you don’t. That is not your purpose in life.
You cannot change someone who is abusive. You can only change you. To try to change someone else is a dangerous exercise in futility! So, it is a correct statement that staying in the relationship will not stop the abuse.
No way…it will only encourage the abuse. But, be warned, getting out of a relationship is often the most dangerous time. You might need help of counselors and others to get out safely.
Since, over time, the abuse will get worse. You need to make a safe plan to follow when the abuse happens again. Please, if you are in an abusive relationship, get professional help on this, maybe from a school counselor or parent.
Here was one question and answer for staying in an abusive relationship: I’ve tried several times to end my relationship, but my partner says life would not be worth living without me. I love my partner and don’t want to hurt my partner. What should I do?
The answer: Your partner has low self esteem. This is one of the early warning signs of abuse. People with low self-esteem do not like themselves very much. In a dating relationship a person with low self-esteem may say, “I’m nothing without you,” or “You are my world.” This is not real life. Your partner is the one responsible for learning to like himself/herself. As long as you stay in a relationship like this you allow your partner to use you as a crutch and your partner may never seek the help she/he needs.
This article copyright 2008 by Linda Culbreth. You may freely reprint this article as long as you use exactly like it is with no changes, additions, or omissions, including the resource box.